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Did you know that Alaska has the highest male to female ratio in the United States? We’re talking 110 men for every 100 women. Conversely, these Countries rank in the top 10 where women far outnumber men. Thank u, next.
So guess where I’m going to live for 8 weeks? You got it! The land of incredible natural beauty, zero State sales tax and more men than you can shake a glacier at! Alaska here I come. 
With three grown children all off to University, momma bear needs to see some polar bears; change up the scenery, both figuratively AND literally. So off we go.
The Google either thinks empty nesters are always married or insufferably boring. A quick google search of “Top 3 Things to Do as Empty Nesters” yields both hysterical and wildly depressing results for an active, sexy woman in her early 50’s. NO, I’m NOT going to take up basket-weaving, have a romantic picnic in a park or maybe the worst suggestion – Establish a New Routine. (like, what even IS THAT!!??) I’m going to travel and eat foreign foods and gamble in Las Vegas and maybe enter a Dog Sled Race and of course, most importantly, I’m going to SLAY ALL DAY! Bring on the men!
In preparation for my Next Great Life Adventure, I’m selling my house and ridding myself of 85% of my possessions. (Sidebar: if you want to buy my house, click HERE and ask for Greg)
There’s a bitter sweetness in planning your next chapter. Raising my three children has been the most rewarding, challenging and beautiful thing I have ever done. I often yearn for the days when they were just newborns and toddlers and early teens as every stage brought something new and exciting. But now it’s about me! What do I want to do? Where do I want to go? I know for sure I don’t want to stay in Toronto. I’ve lived here most of my life and kinda been-there-done-that.
This is just the start of the new chapter in my life, because if anything has taught me in the last three years, it’s the following:
- a pandemic can hit at any time and wipe out a swath of the population; then make people go completely insane in ways you couldn’t imagine
- dating a married man for any period of time is IDIOTIC
- paying over 50% of my hard-earned wages to the government is both asinine and nonsensical when I have no means to properly and fairly audit what they’re doing with my money
- carrying a 4,500 sq. ft. house when my kids have moved out is absurd
- my best best friends will always be rooting for me, and I, them
- life comes at you fast – live with minimal regrets, don’t a give a f*** what people think of you (unless you’re a dick, then think about that for a second) and…
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD – don’t stay in a dead-end job and don’t stay in a dead-end relationship. You’re not the emotional Red Cross. You’re in charge of YOU and make damn sure you’re doing it with enthusiasm and grace.
BUCKET LISTS
Why was the snowman smiling?
